24 Comments

I like this. Now to read again to determine why this thing has me weeping.

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Thanks Rena. Hopefully happy weeps 🙏

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David, I can't find the words to say how moving I found this.

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Wow Deborah thank you. And I read your post today and thought how you are experimenting and creating, and doing so much. I think that is what I was getting at here. Just this "other" thing that exists between all the work and the doing, the magic which grows.

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It was so odd. I finished my post and then saw yours, it was serendipitous. It really spoke to me. Thank you.

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This stanza. 👏

Until it comes apart at the letter,

Until it reaches up through the line,

Until its sound is set adrift,

Until its meaning is floating in time,

Until it colours the blacks of your eyelids,

Until it whites the silence in your mind,

Until you forget its very shape and form,

Until you’ll not remember it at all.

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Wow thanks Brian! ☺️

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Lovely:

"Formed of wondrous line

Wired with frivolous letter,

Renewed in extreme sensation,

Drenched in vibrant colour"

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Thank you so much 🙏🙏🙏

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The section where each line begins with until - it feels to me like the way time passes without notice when we're engaged in the thing we love to do, completely with body and mind and heart.

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Yes perhaps that state of flow where everything else blurs out of view and you are just in it. I can see that. I think that is where that is going - reaching that sort of fluency certainly :)

Thanks again for the support and taking the time to comment.

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What a thing you've done, David! You caught me unprepared :)

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Thank you so much Fontini! I'll try to give you fair warning next time 😅☺️

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Please don’t. I like good surprises!

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And so full and present

It pulls together

The spaces

And memories

And smells

And sounds

And laughter cried,

And cries of laughter,

I love how you are working with repetition and the rhythm of the poem. Really wonderful.

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Definitely a lot of that in my writing lately. I am quite taken with rhythms and patterns so I suspect it comes from that. 😅 I do have to stop myself a bit sometimes.

Thanks for coming along again and commenting, amazing to have your support so regularly!

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Really like the energetic lines, mixing with the more vague sensed ones. Resonates. Lovely David! Step-change in style these last two pieces.

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Yes, more step changes coming.. bit nervous about the next ones 😅 but i'm gonna give it a go and see how it lands. 🤷‍♂️

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And laughter cried,

And cries of laughter,

Just perfect.

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Thanks Treasa! 🙏🙏🙏

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I love @David Donoghue and @Thomas Rist poeming all over our Thursdays.

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Yes yes! His work is fantastic!

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I sure like the driving pulse.

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Thanks Weston, definitely a flow in there that I felt and went with it. Thanks for taking the time to comment!

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